Babyfather won’t give me child support

Dear Pastor,

I hope you are keeping well and you did not suffer any damage from the hurricane.

I am writing to you about my children's father. I have two children by him. He used to say that I was the one who wanted these children because if I did not want to have children, I would have protected myself. This man is a Rastafarian. When I told him that I was going on the Pill, he did not want me to. When I got pregnant with my first child, his only fuss was that it should have been a boy instead of a girl. He did not want me to go out and work. My brothers help me to support these children and they told me to take him to court, but I could not deal with that. One of my brothers is a businessman, so he employed me to take care of the office and he paid me.

I left my children's father because I met a man who came to the office and introduced himself to me. We got to know each other. He called me every day. I left my children's father and went back to my parents' home with my two girls. My children's father said he would change and he begged me to return to him, but I haven't. He started to give me money, but then he said I have to give him something. What he was trying to say is that he wanted sex from me whenever he gives me money, so I told him to keep his money. I was afraid that this man would hurt me, so I asked my two brothers to talk to him, and to tell him not to come back to our house. The nasty man said that the reason why my brothers don't want him to come back to our house is because I was having an affair with them. That is so far from the truth.

I have a good thing going with this man I met at my brother's business place. He told me that he would support my two daughters. He is not living in Jamaica. I really love this man and I would marry him. He has never been married. He was born in Jamaica, but he grew up in the United States of America. He is in the same type of business as my brother. I am going to take the chance and marry him. I am 30 and he is 32. When he comes back to Jamaica, we will come and see you and ask you to perform our wedding ceremony.

I.L.

Dear I.L.,

I am glad that you are working and earning a daily bread. This man is giving Rastas a bad name.

Good Rastas support their children even if they are not in very good jobs. You were quite correct in ending the relationship with him; he is a no-good man. But there are so many men who are like him. For them to support their children, the mothers of these children have to go to bed with them.

Concerning this man who you have fallen in love with, I hope he is serious about you and that he would marry you. I wish you well. I would be very happy to meet with both of you whenever he returns to Jamaica. I wish you well.

Pastor