Dating but in love with another girl


January 19, 2016

Dear Rev

I am 21 years old and I like reading your column in THE STAR. Back in high school I fell in love with this girl. I loved her so much I could hardly eat, even though she never gave me a chance and dated other guys. It's been four years, but I still love her and it affects me dating other girls because even though I don't feel the love as much as before, I still remember her.


Dear Confused,

Unconditional love is really hard to understand and you really can't stop it happening as it is more than just an emotion or an attraction. You made a choice to love her irrespective of her seeing other guys. However, your love, though, seems unrequited as she is not having similar thoughts of you in this regard and only sees you as her friend. As for forgetting her, anything that impacts on us is hardly ever forgotten unless by conscious choice. You have to decide that she may not be for you or at least not now and move on to focus on other objectives in your life. You are still young and the odds of finding someone who loves you back are many.

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